Monday, December 22, 2008

Feeling the Baby

Each time I go to the doctor the nurse/assistant asks me “have you felt the baby move yet?” I try to explain to her what I have felt that I think could be the baby. She’ll then respond that most women describe it as a “flutter” and asks if I have felt that. I then respond that ‘no’ I have felt nothing that I would describe as a “flutter” so therefore I have not definitively felt my baby. I am 21 weeks today. I am in the range for feeling my baby. But what is a “flutter” anyway? What I have felt is not what I would call a “flutter”. To me I associate the word “flutter” with butterflies, because butterflies “flutter”. To me, butterflies, already have a distinct feeling that I associate with my stomach turning over on itself and being tied up in knots, mostly due to anxiety. What I have felt is nothing like that.

I asked my mom and sister what they would describe it as, the best description has been “consistent gas”. I don’t think I would describe it was gas either. I could see how what I have felt could be described as gas, but it still feels different than gas.

So how do I describe what I am feeling? Well about week 18 I started feeling pressure or a tightness in one spot or area of my lower stomach. For example there would be a spot, not quite an inch in size that would all of the sudden feel tighter. If I poked that spot, it was tight and not squishy as the surrounding area, then after a minute or so it would go away. I was thinking that was my baby. Then about 19 ½ weeks I started to feel what I would call an air bubble, that moves from one area of my lower tummy to another. Then over the past few days I’ve started feeling a more abrupt movement from the middle to then bump in a spot, I might choose to describe this as similar to a muscle spasm but not exactly the same feeling. None of these feelings would I use the word “flutter” but none can I remember feeling prior to be pregnant. I keep thinking that one day I will feel something and think ‘oh that’s what a “flutter” feels like.’ So this all begs the question, am I just being oversensitive to anything I feel in that area? They aren’t all the time, nor do I go days without feeling anything. I can say since it started I have felt something every day. Does the fact that I can’t call it a “flutter” diminish what I have been feeling? Since I can’t call it a “flutter”, have I then not felt my baby yet? Is what I am feeling only my body making adjustments? Or maybe my normal functions? Or do I want to feel the baby so much that I am imagining that every twitch or muscle spasm is a baby? So again: what is a “flutter”?


Shannon said...

You'll know it when you feel it :)

I had some tightening and a little bit of cramping when I was pregnant with Brian. It turned out it was my ligaments stretching. You'll feel the baby soon enough :)

Are you going to find out if it's a boy or a girl?

Arizona Girl said...

I have already gone through that, and it was very painful for me. But this tightness is just one spot and not always the same spot.

Ellen said...

Yeah, I never had any idea about the whole "flutter" thing either. I don't remember when I first felt Anna but the first time it felt like a poke from the inside. Very strange. As your baby gets bigger, it will be more obvious, but I would guess that you have probably felt it already.

Holly Janeen said...

first of all- i wanted to say that you are like the future General Primary President of the church. what the heck is with you being so creative with ALL singing times? um, you basically make all other primary choristers look bad!

second of all, i didnt even know you were pregnant! (i am so lame)... CONGRATS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i am way excited for you :)

third of all, i know whatcha mean. i was LONGING for the first knowledge of the kid moving... and i would hear so many different things from everyone. i hope you get to the point where you know for sure that its a kick! and i hope you enjoy every second of it... its one of THE best things about being pregnant. in fact, i would say- its magical :)